On loyalty

[bunsen_h]

If/when I do something obnoxious, when I'm a jerk, I don't want my friends to support me on that point.  Please: point out that I'm in the wrong.  Politely/gently, if possible, because I'm more likely to get the message, but... please don't stand by me and say that I've done nothing wrong, out of some kind of perceived loyalty.  That's not a kind of loyalty that I want.  If someone else points out that I'm in the wrong, it's okay to agree with that person.

(Similarly, if I'm wrong on some point of fact, please correct me.  Some of the things that I know just ain't so.) 

If I'm in some kind of competition, please don't run down my competitors, claiming that they're ineligible or something if they're not, out of some kind of perceived loyalty.  I try to play fair and square.  Mud-slinging "on my behalf" makes me look bad.

I won't scream at my friends for "betraying" me by not supporting me when I'm in the wrong.  If I do have some kind of gross personality dysfunction and start screaming at my friends... see above under "If/when I do something obnoxious".

People who are jerks cause enough problems in society.  The "friends" who give them moral support compound the problem in several ways.