A whinge and a sprayer

[bunsen_h]

The creatures who work for Weed Man are presumptively Epsilon-Minus Semi-Morons.  Or they wouldn't work at spraying toxic chemicals all over the place.

They are demonstrably illiterate.  Or they wouldn't have sprayed their crap all over my lawns last autumn, because they would have read the street sign right by my driveway, and would have gone looking for the correct street a block and a half away.  Several of my friends and colleagues have had similar problems with them: stubborn attempts to spray where they are not merely unwanted but abhorred.

So how do I keep these damn kids off my lawn?

Also, the creatures who work for Springmaster are the worst infestation of street spammers this city has seen in years.  Possibly ever.  I don't want them around either.

Comments

[beable]

Is it so wrong to be sad that violence is not the answer?

I think embedding some sort of spray-sensitive trigger in your lawn (an Agatha-worthy creation of subtlety and genius) that redirect the spray back at the creatures themselves might learn them a thing oor two about double-checking their welcome.

Either that or it would eliminate them from the gene pool. Either way, it's a win, right?

[bunsen-h.livejournal.com]

Arson is probably farther than I want to go, though there would be useful chemicals stockpiled at their site for convenient application. But though it would be effective, there's some chance that I'd get into trouble for it.

[o-bunny.livejournal.com]

One word -- SuperSoaker.

Or is that two words? Well, the sentence is three (or four).

Maybe a SuperSoaker filled with a mercaptan of some ilk...

[bunsen-h.livejournal.com]

No use unless I happen to not only be at home when they come, but notice them before they start poisoning my property.

[auriaephiala.livejournal.com]

Much as I would like to commit mayhem on these folks, the practical exigencies don't work ...

A coroplast sign or signs on your lawn saying "No Chemicals on this lawn" and "No Trespassing -- that means You, WeedMan" might work.

Maybe you need to educate your neighbours so none of them invite the jokers in.

[suelet.livejournal.com]

Possibly phone the company and inform them that you will be suing for damages???

Or that if their vehicle is spotted in front of your house you will be charging them with trespass?

Or that if they are spotted on your property again you will be phoning the police and having them arrested for public nuisance?