Nuances

[bunsen_h]

When someone, in conversation, refers to "my current [partner]", does this suggest a pattern of short-term relationships?

I don't think that a Thurber allusion was intended.

Comments

[auriaephiala.livejournal.com]

It suggests their current relationship isn't of long standing, but not much else.

I agree re the Thurber cartoon (which is wonderful).

[metalana.livejournal.com]

What's wrong with recognizing that one's current romantic partner has not been life-long? It would be disrespectful to pretend that previous partners don't exist. It's also reasonable to assume a person will have different partners in future (either simultaneously with the current one, or not.)

Contrary to auriaphiala's theory, I avoid using the label "partner" for a person I've started dating but haven't gotten too committed/serious about.

(When discussing sex, I use the term "partner" for anyone I have sex with, regardless of commitment level. This mirrors use in safe-sex literature. In such conversations, it may be very important to distinguish a current sex partner from a former sex partner.)

[auriaephiala.livejournal.com]

Contrary to auriaphiala's theory, I avoid using the label "partner" for a person I've started dating but haven't gotten too committed/serious about.

Not what I said. I never mentioned the level of seriousness/commitment.

What I was getting at was: if you've been in a relationship of 6 months, a year, even two years, you might refer to your "current" partner because your friends would easily remember your previous partners.

When you get to relationships of 5, 10, or 20+ years, talking about "current" in relationship to your partner sounds silly, if not disrespectful.

[bunsen-h.livejournal.com]

I didn't intend a value judgement with the question.

The actual word used was -- to keep the question gender-neutral -- "girlfriend" or "boyfriend", not "partner". I'd hoped to keep the question neutral and simple; "partner" seemed to be an appropriate generalization.

[suelet.livejournal.com]

Depends on the context of the conversation.
If I'm referring to "my current partner" as opposed to my "ex", that's one thing.
If I'm introducing said partner to someone new, I might leave out the "current".
If I'm talking to a longstanding friend (say, you!) about my partner, I might say "current partner", but if I'm talking to someone who doesn't know me so well it would become "partner", because the details are likely irrelevant to them.
See? Context! :)

[bunsen-h.livejournal.com]

Context, of course. In this case, no mention of any other relationship, to a group of (mostly) strangers. It seemed odd to me to add that qualifier, vs., say, "new", or no qualifier at all. Part of the oddness may be due to my own biases, of course.

[utsi.livejournal.com]

i think it would have struck me as odd too